How to stop pushing to get things done in life
How to use your will in service of your soul
The other day I was telling my friends about why I'm so fired up for my business this year.
I shared that I found myself creating business plans and even revenue forecasts! Before now, I’d been resistant to doing this kind of left-brain planning — even though I do it all the time for my clients — because when I fell short of my projections, I would use it as evidence that I was a failure and not meant to do this thing that means everything to me.
My friends asked me what's so different about this year.
I said, "I use my will differently now."
Before, I was misusing my will. I would push, drive, and control to try to get my business — hell, my life — the way I wanted it.
I was approaching my work from a place of fear which left me unfocused and unsure.
Because I didn't believe in myself — I'd lost my mojo due to past work traumas — every single thing I did became a litmus test of my worth, measured in success or failure.
Do you see the problem here? Instead of using my will to turn inward and cultivate self-belief, I tried hard to "succeed" in the hope that would make me feel worthy.
I explained to my friends, “Now I use my will to keep showing up for myself, over and over. When I feel fear or doubt, I use my will to lovingly stay with what I’m feeling instead of forcing and controlling my external world in an attempt to feel better. My will now takes the form of devotion to my business and belief in myself.”
Now, my will serves my soul.
I think of will as focused energy vs level of effort.
Will, used as focused energy, becomes a self-replenishing wellspring that you can continually use to support yourself. Will, lovingly directed inward, becomes a source of comfort and strength that sustains you through the hard parts and fuels your devotion to yourself and your craft.
How do you use your will in service of your soul?
It’s simple, but not always easy.
When you feel those fears and insecurities come up along with that urge to start messing with things out there so you can feel good inside...
Your mind will want you to gogogo. Lovingly use your will to stop.
Go inward instead. Turn toward yourself and be with the discomfort instead of trying to force or control through external action.
If you can be with the discomfort and allow your nervous system to calm down, more options will become available to you. From there, you can take grounded action. Don’t be afraid to get support if you need it.
That’s it. You won’t do it perfectly. You’ll forget. You’ll freak out.
But little by little, you’ll start seeing a change in your outlook and how you meet life’s challenges. Things will start to flow more. You’ll ride the waves easier.
And more flow is my fervent wish for you.
I help people get clarity and create momentum in their lives. Whether it's their work-life, relationships, life stage, or building their business, people usually come to me because they're at a crossroads and are unsure how to proceed.
If you're reading this and leaning in, let's chat.
Just grab me for a free 30-minute consult. No pressure, promise.